Covid-19: The Beginning

When I knew schools were shutting down for the forseeable future, I ran to the dollar store to get journals for my boys. I knew this event would be something they would remember forever, and I wanted that memory as correct as possible. Keeping a journal also helps with writing skills, and given the unknowns with school, I figured it couldn't hurt. (Of course, whether we'll be able to read Oliver's is up in the air. Ugh, third-grader handwriting.) But I should have done the same for Chuck and me: required writing. March 11 seems like forever ago, even though it's less than four weeks. I just remember that night, sitting on the couch, watching shows with Chuck, but mostly paying attention to crazy news I was reading on my phone. What in the world was happening?! It seemed like dominos were falling, first one thing was cancelled, and then another, and then another. It was all so shocking.

Of course I thought of myself and what all the closings and cancellations would mean. But then I thought of my husband and our boys. As we sat down to dinner on Friday the 13th (the last day of school at actual school), we told them three things:

1. The adults in the house were not worried about those who lived in the house. We felt confident that even if we got sick, we'd be fine. And that the kids had the best chance of all of us! We were worried about older neighbors, older family members, those we know who already have health problems. But we wanted them to not be afraid.
2. Be prepared to feel lots of things. It is okay! We're all feeling loss and mourning. It's okay to feel angry. It's okay to feel sad. We're all feeling it. It's okay to be bored. With all the restrictions, we know there will be things we can't do. And be stuck in the house might be fun at the beginning, it will get old. So Many Feelings.
3. Be prepared to hear, "I don't know" a lot. There are so many things that are changing so quickly that we just don't know what tomorrow will look like. At the time, we didn't know if my parents were still going to be able to come out. We didn't know if we could go camping. So much unknown, so hard.

And now, almost four weeks later, these things are still applicable. Something new will come up that we learn is a loss, and we're sad/mad all over again. There are still so many things we don't know. And it's hard. But we're getting used to it. Maybe.