Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The Incompetence Returns

Every new phase that Rhett begins, I love it. I love when he mastered the head control.  I love when he could sit up on his own.  I love when he started babbling more and more.  With each new phase, I felt better as a parent, simply because I had more time under my belt.  But with this latest one, I'm feeling like I'm a new parent all over again.

The transition to Rhett eating solid foods has been so hard for me.  I feel like once he turned six months old, the doctors said, "Go ahead and start him on solids.  God speed."  Nothing else.  Except, of course, for all the things I should not be giving him, like nuts, milk, and honey.  But I felt at a loss when it came to what I should be giving him.

Even the first part was easier: rice cereal a couple of times a day, and then move to the vegetable and fruit purees.  But now that he's too big for those, I just hate feeding time.  I want to expose him to fun and different foods, but have no idea where to start. And then when I try things, some days he'll like them and I'll be excited but then the next day he won't. And then I have four servings of couscous that I have no idea what to do with. Also, I'd like to move from just finger foods to real meals, but again, like what? I can't give him pasta stars seven nights a week.  (If you have any ideas, please let me know!)

When you are pregnant people told me how hard being a parent is, and I believed them. But I think it's hard for different reasons for different people (the same reason being married is hard for different reasons). For me, one of the hardest things has been a feeling of complete incompetence. Generally in my non-parent life, I don't feel this way. When given a problem, either I know how to solve it right away, or I know I can figure it out (this usually happens by a fancy internet search). But babies? Not even close. When Rhett was brand new, Chuck and I both felt this feeling of incompetence. After a couple of months, however, it thankfully went away. But now it's back with a vengeance. And until he's eating the same things I'm eating, I'm fairly certain it will be staying with me.


  1. Welcome to the club! The feeling comes and goes I am assuming now for the rest of your life. I have good days and bad days and just have to know that whatever comes next I will learn to deal with that too. Best of luck!

  2. I think you are doing a great job, Rhett is happy and growing, so far so good.
    As far as food goes, have you seen this site... (Sorry I'm not sure how to link it in a comment) It really helped me with what to feed Isaac and when. I never really adhered strictly to the schedule, but it gave me some good ideas.

  3. yes, it's always hard transitioning to anything for anyone i think. there's nothing wrong with sticking with baby food and finger foods, though. that can be their whole meal and you can leave it at that.

    if you want him to start eating what you eat, have you tried blending/pureeing your stuff and giving that to him? as long as it's not chunky, he can try most things you eat.

    but don't worry, this phase will be over someday. it's still a worry, though, about what to feed your kids - no matter the age. i have to come up with 3 meals a day and 2 snacks a day for 3 kids. argh. :)

  4. I have to agree with Emily. The worry never really ends. My kids will eat something one day and have nothing to do with it the next. Sadly, a lot of food gets thrown away, we just try and offer good things as much as possible.

    I loved the blender method Emily told you about. When we had lasagna, I just tossed it in the processor and served it up that way.
    When we had chicken enchiladas we did the same thing.

    By the way, Rhett is awesome! Evan is still talking about what a good baby he is! I don't think any of mine have been that easy going.

  5. I'm with you. Molly eats the following: chicken nuggets, pbjs, and hot dogs. She also eats bananas, the diced peaches, and crackers. Sometimes bread. And that's about it! I wish I was more competent in the solid foods arena myself!! I think it must be a mystery until she can talk to me!! I know, I'm not much help!

  6. I'm still struggling with this. David loves certain foods some days and hates them some other days. He's very picky. also helped me a lot during the first months of solids. Have you tried avocados? David hated them when he was just starting on solids, but now he loves them. I also found these rice crackers at Wal-Mart called, Mum Mums and I spread different fruit purees on them. David loved holding the crackers and being able to feed himself. I also started on the YoBaby yogurt when he was six months old. Good luck!

  7. oh man i can't get over how CUTE this pic is of rhett. i could eat him for lunch! yeah zig is not big on anything that has texture, alas we are still feeding her gerber 2nds because at least we know she'll eat those. however we did have a slight breakthrough tonight when i cut up some homemade chicken noodle soup and she ate it for a while and then decided to start spitting the chunks of carrots back out. for the love! it's the same thing as the smooth version.