My Hard Life

Remember when Chuck and I got a heated mattress pad for our anniversary? It's nearly perfect. It's warm; it's dual-controlled (so Chuck can make his side of the bed into a sweat lodge and I can not melt); it makes getting into bed in our 58-degree bedroom not a terrible experience. But there exists one design flaw: it doesn't turn itself on. I mean, c'mon: Does it really expect us to remember to turn it on 15 minutes before we want to go to bed? I think that's asking a LOT of us. Instead, it should just have a timer so that we can set it to always turn on at 9:45 p.m. Because then my life would be easy.