Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Things I Would Tweet if I Twittered

"I can't stop eating these hint of lime chips. This is not a good thing."

"I want my two nostrils! Dang this stupid cold."

"Why is there nothing good on the internet? How else am I supposed to waste my time?"

"I now have two tricks for killing crickets: throwing a book on them and vacuuming them. One more effective than the other."

And we should all bow our heads and say a prayer of gratitude that I don't use twitter.

4 comments:

  1. Yeah, I don't do the Twitter thing either. . .

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  2. I'm a non-twitterer, as well. And I want my nostrils back, as well...Hope you feel better, soon.

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  3. i'll third that - i want both of my nostrils functioning, too. 'tis the season, i guess.

    awesome twitters. whatever twitter is. what it is? like facebook?

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  4. A friend of mine who was having trouble with crickets (small ones) bought a Venus flytrap and has had great success. Sure, the trick is getting the bugs near the plant, but it'll save you from having squish spots on your books.

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